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Feeling Happy in Zürich

I feel like I’ve turned a corner in my life. For the first time in ages, and I mean ages, I feel happy and contented. We’re settled in Zurich in our new flat in Stauffacher and Spring has sprung. Everywhere is just so fresh and green. This week (after being in London for a week) all the cafes and restaurants seem to have decided that is the time to move their clientele outside, and chairs and tables are everywhere. I took the tram to Bellevue yesterday evening. As the tram travelled along Bahnhofstrasse and came to Buerkliplatz, the view over the lake was just amazing. The evening light was quite low and all the buildings seemed golden. The lake was clear and the distant mountains which you normally can’t see, where white and clear and just so beautiful.

It has certainly been a couple of stressful months. I didn’t particularly enjoy packing and cleaning the flat and leaving London, whilst Alan was already here. The stress of the Module 4 essay was almost unbearable. I thought it would make things easier, to go back and forth between London and Zurich. I certainly didn’t feel ready to leave my shift and in fact, I still don’t, although I’ve only got a few shifts left now. Over time though, I’ve found it harder and harder to leave Zurich. I don’t know how long we’ll stay here, but already I feel very settled. It feels good to be building a new life with Alan. We’ve talked more and done more together, than we ever did in London. The sex is slowly getting better and better, and today, I even feel as though I might be pregnant.

The challenge of living here, is the challenge of actively doing new things. Because it’s such a new environment, that means things as simple as having a coffee in a new café, finding a new restaurant to eat at, or just taking the opportunity to explore new streets. Sometimes, the challenges aren’t huge in themselves. Its more a case of actually doing it, actually getting out and chalking up a new experience, however small, instead of staying in the flat and doing what I normally do.

I think my feelings of contentment and feeling settled are helped by the fact that the research is going well. I know more about what I want to do, and the research interviews schedule is definitely coming together. I’m excited about what I might find. It’s hard to admit that London made me so miserable, and that DTZ was a fairly negative experience by the end. It’s fair to say that 2003 was a difficult year for both of us. Just for the fact that we were both working so hard and both so stressed – even Alan. Until you move away from that context you don’t see the downsides. We had very little time off and I certainly found the degree hard to keep going with.

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