Helen Palmer (nice_cup_of_tea) wrote,
Helen Palmer

Marvellous 24 hours a day?

"Children don't need their parents to be marvellous 24 hours a day - their needs are quite basic - yet targeting small people as consumers has convinced us otherwise. We are afraid that if we deny them something, they might not love us."
Stephanie Calman from www.badmothersclub.co.uk

I find this quote extremely true and reassuring. I remind myself that my boys need me to love them and feed them and keep them safe. The rest is just noise. And having had a few days to myself in the flat (and feeling less anxious than I have in many months), I realised that I need to care for myself too. Denying myself space and time does not necessarily help M and P. Having time away from both of them has helped me to recharge and to see how much I do do for them.

Lisa Belfield (Huffington Post) writes today in the Huffington Post about the constant judgements (cultural or otherwise) between parents, the comparison of parenting styles, the fear that other people are better parents than us. And suggests that this is not helpful or healthy behaviour.

I read two books in the last year that really helped me with the fear that I was not doing this parenting thing correctly! I can highly recommend Under Pressure by Carl Honore (author of "in praise of slow") and Bad Mother by Ayelet Waldman

If I am marvellous for just a few minutes a day, that's enough for me :-) And hopefully my boys too!

Tags: family, quotes, self_reflection

  • Happy Hair Day (@ Hairyup!)

    Finally got round to having a hair cut today and finally getting some highlights to cover the grey! Quite pleased with the result and it was lovely…

  • Weekend in Luzern!

    We've just had a lovely weekend in Luzern in the sun! We timed it to celebrate the halfway mark of a big work project for Alan. We stayed in a lovely…

  • Easter Weekend

    It's been a perfect long weekend, with a mixture of tasks and treats. We cleared and cleaned the flat and I went into a baking frenzy! Mr.ncot…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 1 comment