Helen Palmer (nice_cup_of_tea) wrote,
Helen Palmer

The Purple Pen of Change

My happiness project involves creating seven pens for myself, each pen is engraved with one of my personal commandments. Read the background to this project.

Pen Style: no 2
Colour: Purple
Statement: Embrace Change
How & Why: I am at heart a scaredy-cat (or "Angsthase" /fear bunny in German) who is fearful of change and who wastes time worrying about fears that never come true. My bold purple pen reminds me that whilst I need not (and probably cannot) look forward to change, I can embrace it.

What does this mean? Embracing change is about naming the change, bringing it up close for a good inspection, thinking through the positive and negative aspects of the change and then accepting the ambiguity and perhaps the discomfort of that change. Keeping the change up close and personal, hugging it to myself, means that I disarm it. I am reminded and comforted by two quotes.

Anatole France: All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another.
Christine Kane has this to say about decisions: Decision is a lot about loss. It’s about being strong enough in your choice to allow a loss of other options. (The word “Decision” comes from the Latin ‘decisio,’ which means “to cut off.”)

Making a change (and there is always a decision close behind every change) is about a certain loss. We can't travel all paths simultaneously. The best we can do is to make the wisest decision we can at that point in time, embrace the change and then travel that path courageously.

Watch this lj space for my new travels as an 80% working mother. And watch me give that change a bloody big hug!
Tags: happy, self_reflection, writing

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