Helen Palmer (nice_cup_of_tea) wrote,
Helen Palmer
nice_cup_of_tea

I wept without knowing whether I rejoiced or mourned.



My dear friend Al, who has Aimee, who is just 2 months older than Markus, has just written a lovely blog post on being a mother.

“Just as there is no warning for childbirth, there is no preparation for the sight of a first child... There should be a song for women to sing at this moment, or a prayer to recite. But perhaps there is none because there are no words strong enough to name that moment... I beheld myself as an infant in my mother’s arms, and caught a glimpse of my own death. I wept without knowing whether I rejoiced or mourned. My mothers and their mothers were with me as I held my baby.”
- The Red Tent, by Anita Diamant


I love the phrase "I wept without knowing whether I rejoiced or mourned" because this completely describes how I have been feeling. I look at Markus and can't believe that he found us, that he is here with us. And I am so excited about what is to come and at the same time wanting to hold onto every memory, every gurgle and face that he pulls :-)

I knew intellectually that having a child changes everything and that is what I wanted - but I am just now beginning to learn this emotionally.
Tags: family, happy, mgm
Subscribe
  • Post a new comment

    Error

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 4 comments