Time for a nice cup of tea?

Life Lessons Learnt

Tue, 22 Dec 2009 23:39:37 GMT

Another busy day of shopping (without and then with Markus), cooking, finishing bookshelves and baking carrot cake. My parents and sister arrive tomorrow, flights and weather permitting. Today has reminded me of two important life lessons, which I really should learn...

1. Don't let the perfect be the enemy of the good (as seen on Gretchen Rubin's Happiness Blog)
The bottom 2 shelves of the bookcases now contain folders from my school days and 2 university degrees. I wanted to thoroughly sort through all the folders and decide what to keep. Instead I just put them as neatly as I could in the shelves, with a promise to myself to sort them later. Not perfect, but good is enough at midnight. And good is better than not having done this at all!

2. Don't save things for best.
I was trying to decide which book to start to read in the bath and thought of a new book that I have bought myself for Christmas ("And another Thing" by Eoin Colfer, the last in the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series). I immediately thought "No, I should save that for a special occasion". And then it dawned on me, every day is a special occasion. Don't buy or keep things for best, just use and enjoy them in the moment.

And with no further ado, let bathtime and relaxation commence!

December 2009 @ www.helenpalmer.co.uk

Sat, 19 Dec 2009 23:46:52 GMT

December 2009:We are preparing for our first family Christmas and are full of gratitude for our blessings in 2009. Happy Christmas and a peaceful 2010 to you all! Click here for my visual review of 2009.
All monthly entries here

2009: The Year in Pictures

Sat, 19 Dec 2009 23:11:14 GMT

2009: The Year in Pictures
Originally uploaded by nice_cup_of_tea

from top left, left to right
Jan: By Lake Geneva, weekend away
Feb: Snowshoeing in the mountains with Katie
Mar: Day trip to felsentor
April: Work trip to Wroclaw

April (2): Sechselauten with parents and Young Family
April (3): Trip home to the UK, sorting boxes at the Anchorage
May: Emmas First Communion, Dublin
June : Holiday in Malta

July: Summer walk in Zurich
Aug: Final weekend away to Lucerne, Hotel Montana
Aug (2): Markus arrives on 14th August
Aug (3): Leaving hospital on 20th August

Sept: My parents meet Markus
Oct : The Connor Girls meet Markus
Nov: Dublin Grandpa with Markus
Dec : Weekend to Florence with work team

All my 2009 Photos

Woman on a mission!

Sat, 19 Dec 2009 22:21:52 GMT

After a frustrating day yesterday, when nothing went to plan and I got nothing done, today I have been the Duracell Bunny :-)
I have:
Fed Markus (many times)
Bathed Markus
2 loads of washing done
Cleared and organised cellar
Cleared and organised attic
Sorted out my bookshelves
Rung out for pizza (didn't cook, I'm not superwoman!)
and make 2 batches of polish cake

Can I go to bed now? :-)

Memories!

Sat, 19 Dec 2009 11:08:20 GMT

Remembering a very special moment exactly one year ago today "2 lines Alan, 2 lines!"

Livejournal meme of 2009

Thu, 17 Dec 2009 16:38:45 GMT

It's quite simple: the first sentence of the first entry for each month in 2009 :-)
This helps me to clearly see what I really do write about! Where is my focus?

Jan: For once we decided to stay in for New Year's Eve, have a nice meal, watch a DVD and open the windows just before 12 to hear the church

Feb: As each day goes past, I feel a little bit healthier and more confident that *"dangermouse" (as mr.ncot persists in calling my little amigo) will be sticking around!

Mar: I have had such a relaxing, happy weekend and today I am resisting the urge to "get up" - ie I am still in my jimjams!

April: Updating has been a bit sporadic lately, mostly because I am working out of the Wroclaw office and don't get online much. But in short, work trip is going well!

May: Am doing well so far but the list of annoying symptoms are growing :-)

June: We are now on holiday! Our flight is a bit delayed but i have managed to blag our way into the swiss business lounge :-)

July: I had a feeling you were going to be a boy from the very start of my pregnancy. I had always thought I wanted a girl first, but from the very beginning I got the sense of you as a little lad.

Aug: I had a long chat with my sister last night on the phone and she wanted to see how "big" I had got - so I sent her this photo...

Sept: "Don't let the perfect be the enemy of the good" Voltaire - This applies to so much in life, now, if only I could learn to apply this :-)

Oct: I got about 5 hours sleep last night in one stretch, because my boys decided to sleep in the living room (markus in his moses basket, alan on the sofa) and I now feel human again!

Nov: Cometh the cold weather, cometh the colds...

Dec: A year ago (on Dec 2nd and Dec 4th) we had just gone through the final stages of our IVF adventure (egg retrieval and then embryo transfer) and were beginning the long wait to hear whether we had been successful.

Sofa time

Tue, 15 Dec 2009 18:55:35 GMT

2009_12_15
Originally uploaded by nice_cup_of_tea

Today Markus and i went to Einsiedeln, to meet my work friend Yvonne and her two lovely kids, Fiona (nearly 10 months) and David 3.5 years old. We had a lovely time - lunch, lots of chats and cuddles and a brisk but cold walk outside!

Wish Making!

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 23:08:44 GMT

2009_12_14
Originally uploaded by nice_cup_of_tea

My Christmas preparations started officially today, with my friend Karen helping me with making Christmas pudding, mincemeat and 2 carrot cakes. We also did this in 2005, it's becoming a tradition! I was so grateful for the extra pair of hands today to cuddle Markus, but not least the friendship, expert advice and lashings of chit chat!

Karen is an inspirational cook and Christmas guru* - she always knows where you can get ingredients in Zurich, has excellent recipe and entertaining suggestions and is loaning her house to my parents over the Christmas period. Hurrah for lovely friends :-)

*she even makes her christmas cake a year in advance, "feeding" it a little bit of brandy every month :-)

Markus at 4 Months

Sun, 13 Dec 2009 23:46:44 GMT

Today Markus is 4 months old. He is discovering his hands, sucks his fingers and fists constantly. He sleeps 9 to 10 hours a night, but naps only intermittently during the day. He recognises us and follows our voices and movements, cries at night to get company and to be picked up and cuddled. Is very vocal, making lots of gurgles and noises.

Big milestones for me have been leaving him overnight and going away by myself for 2 days. I have written up our birth story and have sorted out all the photos I have taken. I had been wondering how I spent my time, but looking at all the photos reminded me how many guests we have had, and how much I have taken Markus out and about!

We also have a nursery place organised for him from mid February at Kids and Co in Hohlstrasse. Next steps for me are to start exercising more and losing weight before going back to work :-(

But before that we have our first family Christmas to enjoy :-)

My snapshots are up-to-date, and these give a good idea what we have been upto
Photos of Markus in October, November and December

Work trip to Florence

Sun, 13 Dec 2009 23:26:05 GMT

This Friday and Saturday I went with my work team to Florence overnight, in the name of team work and bonding, but mostly to see some art and take photos! It was the first time I have left Markus overnight and it was both easier and harder than I imagined.

I was really worried about leaving him for two days, but actually going was less hard than I imagined. I enjoyed the fact that I had some time to my self, I even took my laptop for the train journey. No internet, but I had 2 journeys of 6 hours and in that time I got some writing done and sorted out all my photos since August. Florence was beautiful, I enjoyed taking photos that weren't of my boy and it was good to be with the team, and I think my colleagues appreciated the fact that I had come on the trip.

What was harder was the fact that I felt left out of work discussions and felt a bit insecure about going back to work in March. It was hard to explain how my life is now at the moment, I think my colleagues just wanted to hear that I was excited to be going back in March. Which I am and am not, if that makes sense. I do want to go back to work, get my projects back, but at the same time I don't want to leave Markus. But that's a topic for a later blog post. I also found that I was the most tired I have been since August. I realised that I am on "baby / stay at home Mummy" tempo and not a normal "adult walking around town and sightseeing" tempo. It was an effort to stay awake and be social. Pumping breastmilk every 4 hours also wasn't fun.

Florence was beautiful and we visited a contemporary art exhibition (the Florence Biennale), at which my colleague Bea was exhibiting. We stayed at a charming 3 star hotel in the centre of Florence and went out for a meal on the Friday evening. Bea also took us on a guided tour of Florence on Saturday morning. And all too soon I was on the train back home!

The youngest reader of my blog!

Mon, 07 Dec 2009 17:38:19 GMT

The gorgeous cutie in the photo is Jamie, little boy of my lovely friend Kerry and partner in crime to Markus. Jamie has featured before on my blog, here and here. Oh, and here.

Anyway, as the photo shows, he now counts as my official youngest reader! Kerry writes...

one of Jamie's favourite things to do is to sit in front of the computer and look at the pictures of Markus on your blog. He uses the mouse to scroll up and down and says 'baby' every time he sees Markus :-)

What a difference a year makes...

Mon, 07 Dec 2009 00:05:10 GMT

A year ago (on Dec 2nd and Dec 4th) we had just gone through the final stages of our IVF adventure (egg retrieval and then embryo transfer) and were beginning the long wait to hear whether we had been successful. The last few weeks I have been thinking a lot about this process.

And now our little lad is nearly 4 months old. He is discovering his hands and what he can do with them, which is mostly stuffing his fists in his mouth to suck on. He recognises us and watches us as we move around the room, smiles at us when we play with him. He laughs, but mostly for mr.ncot, which is a little frustrating! He loves his playgym, kicks vigorously and pulls the hanging animals down. He talks to us, making strange bit loud noises. And we love our new family life.

He is now 6.3kg, and 61.2 cm long. The Doctor on Friday was pleased with all his progress and was amazed that he sleeps 9 or 10 hours straight. Whatever we're doing, he said, we shouldn't change it, because it obviously works! I am slowly getting used to the frustrations of not being able to control how much I get done from my to-do-list :-) Photos as usual below...

Week 16, 15, 14

Happy Thanksgiving!

Thu, 26 Nov 2009 09:19:23 GMT

Last Sunday I celebrated my first ever Thanksgiving, thanks to my very good friend Jill! She writes about it here (and yes, the baby mentioned is Markus!)

Photos here

Our first thanksgiving, our first "social" outing with Markus, and a year after starting the IVF process. Truly lots and lots to be thanksful for (said with a happiness tear in my eye!)

Happy Thanksgiving all!

Tweeting in the gaps

Mon, 23 Nov 2009 20:40:59 GMT

I have been feeling bad that I haven't been posting enough on lj, that I am forgetting what has been going on since Markus arrived. But then I realised that my (fairly) regular tweets will fill in the gaps of everyday minutae! Will try and tweet each day then do a monthly summary like this.

November 2009
10:43 AM Nov 21st - Life is good! Sunny Nov. day and new jeans which fit mami Helen!
4:07 PM Nov 11th - am trying to pay bills online
10:07 PM Nov 9th - am battling insomnia and will shortly be attacking the paperwork on the floor of the office!
11:55 AM Nov 9th - am rocking a puking baby in a babybjärn and now have sick down my cleavage :-)
10:13 PM Nov 8th - have just done my emails, sent email invites for the next pwg event and tried to "catch up" with the internet - night night...
8:56 PM Nov 8th - have just baked a carrot cake with orange icing
9:30 AM Nov 3rd - Frantically typing away to clear my inbox, whilst baby with cold am asleep in the babybjörn on my chest :-)

October 2009
3:14 PM Oct 31st - am off to have a nice long hot bath, do not disturb!!
9:36 PM Oct 30th - am packing new baby parcels for 2 UK friends!
2:47 PM Oct 30th - am nearly a yummy mummy! Eyebrows plucked and eyelashes tinted and now sitting in cafe watching world go by!
6:15 AM Oct 29th - am frantically cleaning the house whilst Markus sleeps, now checking emails with a nice cup of tea in hand!
6:12 PM Oct 27th - am on my first evening out with mr ncot, markus am home with the dublin connors!
11:53 AM Oct 25th - have cleared my desk by the simple method of dumping all the contents into one big box!
9:21 AM Oct 25th - am desperately trying to catch up with my long lamt of overdue emails, before Baby M needs ham next feed!
1:43 PM Oct 16th - am enjoying my first hour home alone without my boys since I came back from hospital! And I am cleaning - someone save me :-)
12:47 PM Oct 11th - Result! Superbaby M slept from 1 til 8 this morning.
5:44 AM Oct 10th - am happy that baby markus have finally fallen asleep at 02.30. He still doesn't quite understand night time ;-)
10:36 PM Oct 7th - am getting as much admin done as possible before the little one wakes up!
6:23 AM Oct 5th - am feeling human after my first good night's sleep since Markus was born - thanks to my lovely hubbie who worked ham sleepy magic on baby!
8:35 AM Oct 4th - laughing at both of my boys having a burping contest - Markus the baby am winning, Alan the adult am trailing behind :-)
6:15 PM Oct 1st - am delighted that I had my 6 week postnatal checkup with Dr, and I can now start exercising again and more importantly, can take a bath!

September 2009

August 2009

January to July 2009

October to December 2008

Happy Mummy

Mon, 23 Nov 2009 19:03:40 GMT

A friend asked me today through skype if I was happy being a mum. I had no hesitation in saying that I was so happy and enjoying being at home with Markus. We're so lucky that he is such a happy, contented, chubby little baby who sleeps well - and it also helps that I have been getting good amounts of sleep for the last month or so.

I wondered beforehand if I would get restless and feel cooped up at home all day long, or whether I would miss work. Um... NO! In fact I have an even busier social schedule with baby than without - meeting friends for coffee, lunch, walks by the lake :-) On our quiet days I enjoy pottering at home, clearing, cleaning, cooking and feeding. Of course, the novelty might wear off if I wasn't going back to work in March. I do get my off moments, particularly when I am absolutely brain dead in the evening.

But on the whole I am a very happy slummy Mummy (hoping to be a slightly yummier mummy when my jojomamanbebe order arrives, am sick and tired of wearing the same 4 nursing tshirts from h and m) who adores cooing over her miracle boy!

Things I now know to be true (since Markus!)

Mon, 16 Nov 2009 10:42:06 GMT

- at 3 months, he's definitely not a new born anymore! He looks and feels and is much less fragile now
- I like pottering around at home, I like the routine and rhythm of changing nappies, feeding, burping. I feel satisfaction in having a clean kitchen, laundry done, clean bedding, folded baby clothes
- I like the fact that I have challenged my expectations of being a mum and being on maternity leave - I love being at home and looking after baby M
- You can get a lot done in an hour, whilst baby sleeps (especially if you prioritize like mad!)
- It's amazing how much time you can spend just gazing at baby sleeping
- The laundry monster is never satisified!
- I thought I would be desperate to get back to work (but I'm not!)
- Mr.ncot can sing :-)

I talked to my good friend Jill yesterday, and was moaning about the fact that I don't have time to get certain things done now, or at least not done in the way I did things before. She gently reminded me of what I have achieved the last 3 months, gettting out and meeting people, keeping up contact at work, having visitors, getting to know Markus. It was a good reminder!

"Little Gerry" meets Sharon

Mon, 16 Nov 2009 00:04:44 GMT

My Aunty Sharon (of thymeoff fame) visited last week and declared herself “smitten” and “besotted” with “Little Gerry” (her name for Markus Gerry)! She cuddled him, talked to him, changed his nappy, I hardly got a look in, except to feed him :-)

We talked a lot about Markus, about her son Michael when he was a baby and of course about our beloved Gerry. We cried and remembered. We walked and talked. And we sent her on her way to Lesotho to do volunteer work for 6 months!

3 months old!

Sun, 15 Nov 2009 23:08:06 GMT

This weekend Markus reached the 3 months milestone. He is now really smiling a lot, occasionally laughs (particularly when he is falling off to sleep) and makes lots of gurgles and vocalisations, which make us laugh. I never understood (although I tried to understand) how parents could talk endlessly about the minutae of their child, but I find myself and Alan doing it constantly (although only in the privacy of our home!) “Look, he’s smiling!” “Look, he’s been sick again!” “Ah, he’s asleep”…. We try and curtail ourselves when out and about in public! He is the best entertainment ever and we really appreciate the miracle that is our baby.

Our little lad is beginning to develop a character now. Loves being tickled under his chin with a muslin. Cries if you put him in a sling, but then falls asleep within minutes. Sneezes a lot. Chews on his fists and hands and is just learning to suck his thumb, will soothe himself by sucking a dummy. Drinks well and has chubby thighs (Alan’s words, not mine). Winding him is no problem - he burps like a champion (he takes after my sister).I love it when my baby rests warm and cuddly on my shoulder.

He sleeps for 7 to 8 hours straight at night, but won’t go to sleep until midnight or later (we think he just likes sitting up with us watching telly). We are now working on the evening routine. It is amazing the changes that he has been through in just 13 weeks and we feel that we are beginning to find our routine with him now. Oh, and he is beginning to develop a bored, frustrated “come and get me/entertain me” cry.

All the previous weeks can be viewed here on flickr. It’s hard for us to see changes in him on a day to day basis, but these photos really show him growing up. It’s a real faff to do each week, but I am glad that I am persevering!

Week 13, 12, 11

Week 10, 9, 8

Week 7

Final pregnancy and baby shoot!

Thu, 12 Nov 2009 19:34:59 GMT

Here are the final photos in my pregnancy shoot - this time with Markus. We went to Basel on the train a few weeks ago, which in itself was a big adventure!

Will post all the photos that I finally choose soon.

We called you...

Tue, 10 Nov 2009 01:06:56 GMT

Dear Markus

When you were just a bump, I wrote a series of blogs to you about the pregnancy, called postcards to my bump. Now that you're here, there's a few more things I want to write to you, as we grow together as a brand new family. And if I call them "postcards to my baby", then I can use the same tag (ptmb) :-)

So here's the first entry. We called you... Markus Gerry Moran. Mgm for short :-)

It took us a long time to decide on names, the process involved lots of post it notes and me secretly looking up names in the baby names book, that your Dad didn't want me to buy! We finally decided on names the week before you arrived and in the hospital, as your Dad was filling out the official form, we were still deciding on spellings!

Why did we choose this name? We liked Markus as a name, just because! We spelt it with a k not a c, so that you can shorten it to Mark, which is the more common "english" form of the name. But Markus is also a popular swiss name, so you'll fit right in here.

I definitely wanted you to have a second name. It gives you the flexibility later on to use it as your first name if you wish. You are called Gerry, after my beloved Uncle and Godfather
Gerry Channer. He died last year, just before we knew that you were on the way to us. He was an amazing person - he was an adventurer, who always looked forward in life. He was generous in spirit, had a fab sense of humour and genuinely cared about all his friends, and he had many. If you turn out like him, we have done a good job. And tomorrow, you get to meet your Great Aunt Sharon for the first time, the other half of Gerry and Sharon... :-)

Finally, you are a Moran. When we got married, we decided that I would keep my surname of Palmer. When we knew that you were on the way, I thought again about whether to change my surname to Moran, whether it was important that all the family had the same surname. But in the end, I stay a Palmer. We are family, whether we are Morans, Palmers or any combination of the two. Let's see how our post arrives!

So, that's why and how we named you...

lots of love
your Mami xxx

Lullabies and tears

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 00:21:50 GMT

Given that I am still slightly hormonal and teary occasionally, when considering my little lad, it still amazes me that I cry each time I listen to the lullabies on our "Wee baby sings" CD.

When I rock my baby and sing along to him, trying to get him to sleep, I feel most like a mother and I hear my mother singing to me. It is a lovely, bittersweet feeling. And my tears refresh me.

My gorgeous blue-eyed boy!

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 00:10:19 GMT

Here's the first photo capturing our lovely lad smiling :-) Up to now, I only got photos with a faint smirk, but this is the real deal!

He now smiles, laughs and burbles away, and has got rid of his first cold. We can't believe how much we love him, how blessed and happy we feel!

The long weekends pass in a blur, but here's the latest rundown

Friday
Helen goes to postnatal yoga (very good session, it's lovely hearing all the other babies burbling, whilst being grateful that I can just concentrate on me. Less stiff than last time)
Alan's work colleague comes for lunch and admires Markus
The swisscom man comes to repair our router
I visit a nursery for Markus (more on nursery searches sometime later!)
Lots of washing done!

Saturday
Helen has a lie in, then does HUGE food shop for the week, takes me most of the afternoon. Shopping is delivered, then Alan goes out to get us indian take away from across the road!
Another baby bunny finished

Sunday
Buy sunday newspapers, meet Jill at Sprüngli in afternoon for a good catch up and gossip
I bake carrot cake, plus try 2 new recipes for supper
Finally get onto internet, for the first time in about a week!

The hardest thing for me at the moment is not having enough time to blog, to read my friend's posts, to upload photos. But I am so happy at the moment, that this is a small price to pay!

Reality strikes!

Tue, 03 Nov 2009 12:45:19 GMT

Cometh the cold weather, cometh the colds...

Last count:
Alan: One cold, been and gone
Markus: Currently suffering his first cold and very grouchy
Helen: Brewing a cold, plus suffering breast infection

But on the plus side, we have a great Chemist, who never fail to give me excellent advice :-)

So, we are doing okay, but I would rather that we were all fighting fit.

In other news, I am convinced that my cognitive processing centres has shifted half a metre south - to my boobs! They seem to control all my thinking and decision making at the moment! Do i have milk? do I need to pump? Are they happy and healthy? Do I need to feed? Who knew breastfeeding was this all encompassing :-) it is amazing to think that all his weight gain and growth is due to me - I am breastfeeding woman, hear me roar!

Post natal Yoga, or why I can't move today!

Sat, 31 Oct 2009 18:27:05 GMT

After failing miserably to get to any sort of pregnancy yoga, I have at least signed up for and gone to 2 post natal yoga sessions at Planet Yoga in Zurich.

I took Markus with me the first lesson, but spent half the time feeding him, so this week I left him with Alan. My body feels stiff and creaky, but it felt good to be opening myself up to yoga again, accepting the changes in my body. It is so special hearing all the other noises of the babies in the room :-)

Baby Labelling!

Sat, 31 Oct 2009 00:43:04 GMT

One of my bestest mates Mags (I have 2 best mates, Sal and Mags - Sal's hubbie calls us the 3 witches!) sent me this photo today and said it looked like I was labelling baby. I was in fact making name badges for the last pwg event :-)

I have had a fab grown up day today - a visit to work to sort out my laptop, lunch with my team, yoga, then a trip to Globus spa for eyebrow shape, eyelash tinting and bikini wax (I may not be a yummy mummy, but I am now at least less hairy!) And then 20 minutes in the cafe texting friends and drinking a little prosecco! I love the fact that lovely hubby works 80% and is very happy to stay at home on a Friday playing with our little lad. How good that sounds! And we still have the weekend ahead of us...